Sunny Sweeney Reveals Miscarriage Inspired ‘Bottle By My Bed’ [WATCH]
Sunny Sweeney is getting "brutally honest" with her newest single. "Bottle By My Bed," for which Sweeney has released a tear-jerking music video, was inspired by Sweeney and husband Jeff Hellmer's attempts to become parents, including fertility treatments and a miscarriage.
In a lengthy interview, Sweeney opens up to People about the treatments she and her husband went through to try and get pregnant, to no avail, followed by an unexpected conception, without doctors' aid. The couple was "stunned" to find out that Sweeney was pregnant, but "everything was sailing along smoothly" ... until Sweeney went in for a regular checkup, and the doctor couldn't find the baby's heartbeat.
"The heartbeat was gone. Gone. No explanation. Nothing," Sweeney recalls. "I waited two weeks to make sure the heartbeat wasn’t just hiding behind something else. Then we had to schedule the dreaded [dilation and curettage procedure]. It took me a couple months to finally digest that I had miscarried."
Sweeney and her husband found themselves buoyed by the support of friends who had similar experiences: "It was comforting to know we were not alone," she says. Although the couple is considering an alternate route to becoming parents, such as adoption, "it’s so hard to put it all out there again."
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"I think we are both hesitant to spend more money right now. I think we both believe in the back of our minds that if I was able to get pregnant before, then surely it can happen again," Sweeney confesses. "I somehow can’t give up hope, despite having every reason to do so."
Readers can press play above to hear "Bottle By My Bed" and see its music video. Sweeney admits that it was "a tough decision" to put the song out there, but now that she has, she's "so happy" that she did.
"The first night I sang it, a woman came up to me afterwards. She was very pregnant and sobbing. She said, 'I know you hate me right now because I’m pregnant. I have spent my last couple of years mad at everyone that was pregnant ... I want you to know that we have tried for years and he’s finally going to be here next week. Please do not give up on this if it’s what you want,'" Sweeney remembers. "It was almost like a sign that on the first night I sang it live, someone that had been 'me' in my situation was telling me to push forward with this ...
"People want to talk about the subject. People need to talk about this. We need to commiserate and lift each other up, both men and women," she adds. "If my song can aid in that process, I feel we have done our job as songwriters."
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